The mental burden is when you have to think of everything in place of your spouse (or spouse): cleaning, shopping, organizing vacations, administration, laundry, schooling for children, appointments with the doctor… Because otherwise, nothing advances, nothing is done, nothing is prepared. In other words, the mental load is not something visible. It’s stuff that clutters your head, occupies your mind, devours free time, and forces you to think of others before you think of yourself. So, to make it visible, Manon decided to film it. Explanations.
Manon is in a relationship with Thomas and, for a year, she has shared the same roof as him. Only then, over time, she realized that she too was a victim of mental stress: naturally but unconsciously, it was on her that most of the household chores rested. When this reality jumped out at her, she tried to talk to Thomas about it, but he didn’t understand. So, to open her eyes, for two weeks, she decided to film her daily life.
For two weeks, I try to show my boyfriend what the loading is, and what level it is with us! ￼ The goal? To show that small everyday gestures do not happen by themselves and represent a big job. Job often assigned to women ￼￼ ready to follow the adventure? ￼
the HuffPost compiled excerpts from his video and collected Thomas’ reaction. Result, a report that should speak to many people, especially among women. Look :
Did Manon’s strategy work? It would seem so. In any case, this is what Thomas suggests, who admits having realized certain things by viewing the images filmed by Manon:
“What bothered us the most was not not doing it, but not thinking about it. When she said to me ‘There is a machine to hang up’, I did it, but I didn’t think about it. It was a reflex that I did not have.
“I now understand what my girlfriend does on a daily basis. The mission was positive, because I know more things about what she does during her day. It was a realization.”
Until it is recognized and identified within each family where it exists, the mental load cannot be better distributed. Hence the importance of talking about it, hence the importance of showing it. In this sense, Manon’s initiative could no doubt be reproduced elsewhere.